In God We Groan

We all get obnoxious little e-mails pushing us to "pass this on." I got one today, the text of which I've printed below.

Please help do this... refuse to accept these when they are handed back to you. I received one from the Post Office as change and I ask for a dollar bill instead..the lady just smiled and said way to go, so she had read this e-mail. Please help out...
Our world is in enough trouble without this too!!! U.S. Government to Release New Dollar Coins You guessed it " IN GOD WE TRUST " IS GONE !!! If ever there was a reason to boycott something, THIS IS IT!!!! DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE Together we can force them out of circulation. Please send to all on your mail list!!!

Aside from being written with the syntax that suggests heavy use of mescalin, a quick trip to Snopes.com proves what any free thinking person can easily figure out - it's bullshit.

It's not the bullshit-y-ness of this e-mail that galls me, though. It's the fact that there are enough people who believe "God" on our currency somehow gives us magical powers to stop men with box cutters, who have God on their currency...it's just not our God. Even though no such thing as "our God" exists.

The general conceit that kills me is that God needs us to do anything for him. The way I see it, if God is all powerful, he doesn't need a million PR people on Earth making life painfully for some of his lowliest children by refusing to take change. He's a big God. He can take care of himself.

I think it would be fun to find this list of folks and give them a list of things they probably should be caring about, in their style.

US Serviceman Refuses to Say "God Bless You" after man he's waterboarding sneezes! Sign this PETITION and have him DISCHARGED! THIS IS IT!!!

or

Homeless Veteran holds sign that says "HAPPY HOLIDAYS." MEET with me at 7 a.m. on THRUSDAY so we can kick the POOPY out of him! How dare he not mention Christmas while begging for our bloated scraps. THIS IS IT!! JESUS NEEDS US!!

or

CHILD with no arms from Iraq is creeping us out on the news. WRITE CNN and tell them to get this kid off our TV. This is Christmas, the time when we're with family and can't be forced to watch armless children cry about how we made them armless. JOIN TOGETHER. PRAISE GOD! THIS IS IT!!!

I seriously don't get people sometimes.